HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ONE OF MY FAVORITE PEOPLE. 

Guys, today is my most loyal blog-reader's birthday. She also happens to be one of my best friends.

She's, y'know, amazing. 

Neena. I figured there was no better birthday card than a blogpost and I can't tell you how many times I've re-written this. You're beautiful and hilarious and smart and witty and such a good friend and I can't even begin to express how happy I am to have you in my life.

I love you a million times over and I cannot wait to have icecream cake with you when you're back from Italy. 

(#neenamarenlucyiannn)

Bappy hirfday. I love you. 

~Maren

Late nights.
Good friends.
Yellow lillies.
My love language is touch and there just aren't better days than the ones when I am dancing. 

Love

Love is a funny thing.
Its funny how we're programmed to want it and its funny how we like to see it in action and its funny how it happens and its funny how there are so many different types of love.
The doting kind.
The vicious kind.
The warm n' fuzzy kind.
The calm kind.
I am a loving person, sometimes to a fault. The last boy I was in love with abused it--because he knew he could--and now I am frankly, kind of afraid of love. Which sort of sucks, if I'm being honest, because it feels dangerous to me now and I still feel as if I can't recognize a situation that is dangerous to me emotionally before it happens. I'm writing this post mostly to verbalize the fact that when I woke up this morning, I woke up sad, because a part of me got deeply deeply invested in someone, in a relationship, that I don't even know how to make work. Its confusing. Another thing that's kind of confusing bewildering to me are the stigmas. We're all going to married to our one true loves by the time we're 25 and havin' babies created from that pure total love by 28? What? Cause, seroiusly, what the fuck, where did that timeline come from? And when did it become the norm? Is that why divorce rates are so high these days? Cause people get to twenty four, suddenly the pressures on? Find a partner, get married, buy a house, have a baby, have a high powered job on the side, health insurance, home insurance, car insurance, property taxes, retirement to some shit hole like Tuscaloosa and then...die? Live out your golden years in a nursing home?
Its fuckin' scary ya'll.
Love is some scary shit. Partially because I know I'll never settle and partially because I know that I'll fight tooth and nail to keep someone if I'm in love with them, and partially because my little heart hurts. My little heart would like to have a nice break and go to the beach and never fall into the dangerous sea of love again.
My, what a ramble.
Some interesting things to ponder though.
Have a good day my loves.
~Maren

I love making goals. Its one of my favorite things to do. Last year, on my birthday, I decided to make a 15 before 16 list (inspired by IJustMightExplode) and it looks like this:

Fifteen Before Sixteen List:
1. Bake a loaf of bread
2. Develop the film I have
3. Go back packing with Mom
4. Try a week without animal products
5. Have a pretty party
6. Learn how to crochet
7. Make redred
8. Frame and re-hang everything on the walls in my room
9. Take a new dance class
10. Learn to play an instrument
11. Volunteer at Brother Wolf
12. Go see a live concert
13. Buy a Polaroid
14. Take a yoga class
15. Dance at Riverfalls


I still have a few left, evidently, but I think the summer will be the perfect time to cross some of these off the list. I'm already planning on trying swing and tango this summer, and, dream come true, a family friend is lending me a banjo so I can learn how to play. I cannot tell you how excited I am. 
Summer is so clooosseeee (I have the bug bites and final exams to prove it), and I'm itching to make new goals. I have summer goals (save dollas, 16 days, mend an old friendship), and I've been thinking even more about long term goals, so I thought I'd write some out on here.

The Five Year Goal List

Visit West Africa for {at least} a month 
Make a quilt 
Go to a yoga ashram
Take a pottery class
Kiss the Blarney Stone in Ireland 
Visit India 
Learn how to play the piano 
Learn how to make really good soup 
Go to Hawaii
Go to Coachella
Go to Austin City Limits
Go to Bonnaroo
Go to Shakori Music Festival
Go to MerleFest
See a Broadway Show
Do a cross country roadtrip
Live abroad for at least six months


This list will inevitably grow, but this is a good start I think. 
I hope you're Monday's have been as good as they possibly could day, and if they haven't, well, here's something to make it a little brighter: I Believe In a Thing Called Love
Love,
Maren